At Christmas
time I walked out of a restaurant and saw five little boys sitting quietly in a
row in the lobby area obviously waiting for a family dinner party. I stopped to stare just a little. Quietly? Can a group of little boys ever wait quietly? Sure.
Each boy had a little phone or electronic gadget with a movie or game
playing in front of him. Each boy was
entirely engrossed by his own tiny screen.
Tiny screens, big screens, our children are
surrounded by screens that do magic things, like keep a row of small, hungry
boys happy in a crowd.
Are these screens really as magic as they
seem?
Recently I attended a class on Children
and Technology taught by Deena Strong, LMFT, LCSW, and Ph.D. She had some interesting things to share
about research in that field and her observations of families in her clinical
practice.
In her presentation, Dr. Strong referenced
many articles and a breadth of research, but one of the sources Dr. Strong has
used that she recommends as being accessible to parents is What in the World are your kids doing online by Melton, B. and
Shankle, S., (2007) New York; Broadway Books.
Dr. Strong suggests that for children ages
0 to 3 there are no advantages whatsoever that come from the child using or
being exposed to technology. Infants
need nurturing from loving caregivers – they need a person, not technology, no
matter how good it is. Infants need to bond to humans and create trust. A screen just can’t do that.
Research reports that Baby Einstein and similar
programs have not shown to be of any
benefit to infants. In fact, there was a
17% decrease in language development for children 0-2 who were exposed to
screen time “baby technology” and a 7% increase in language development in
toddlers who were instead read to by a caregiver.
As
baby grows just a little older, Dr. Strong advises that parents of toddlers
encourage independent play and interactive play with other children instead of
media use. Children this age usually
play beside each other, rather than interact, and it is important for them to
have a parent or adult that encourages and facilitates interactive play.
For children over the age of three
technology might have a place in their daily schedule, but Dr. Strong
recommends for the 3 to 6 year old the child’s total daily computer and video
game time be limited to 45 minutes. This
does not include television time, but TV time should be monitored and limited
as well. Dr. Strong explained that the
growing child needs very hands-on, concrete experiences in the physical world. Children
need to figure out how to do things on their own. In short, they need to run and play and test themselves
against the challenge of real things, like trees and bikes, instead of screen
action.
“Children need to develop empathy, and that
comes from play and interaction and the realization that what they do affects
someone else,” said Dr. Strong. “Children
need to learn to resolve conflicts with friends. They need to participate in unstructured
play.”
In those years from ages 3 to 6 children
learn boundaries and to take responsibility for their choices. They expand their cognitive skills and
abilities and they need to take on pretend roles. They need to test themselves in the actual
world around them, not just become immersed in a prepackaged fantasy world. Technology offers only standardized,
pre-packaged approaches that offer less opportunity for initiative. Even if a game seems to be exciting and
interactive, it is all still very scripted and standardized.
Another concern that Dr. Strong expressed
was that children sitting in front of a computer or screen are isolated. “They miss vital opportunities for
cooperation, collaboration and leadership.”
Learning to get along well with others really is a big deal and
interacting with a computer doesn’t do that.
Dr.
Strong’s most important guideline to remember in considering
technology and appropriate use for children is that “Every minute your child is
using technology, that is a minute he or she is not moving, breathing fresh
air, getting the benefits of sunlight, or learning about him or herself, or
learning how to get along with others.” And a final thought she added, consider
making dinner time a “no-phone and no internet zone.”
I
think Dr. Strong offers sound advice.
Our children have decades as future adults to sit in front of a computer
screen and so few years right now for digging dinosaur bones, tree climbing,
Superman capes and Snow White dresses.
Besides, all those devices will still be there in a few years, only they
will be sleeker, smarter and cheaper for you to buy. The gizmos can wait, childhood can’t.
© Diane Mangum
